How I Put My Habit of Porn to Scorn4 minutes read

I got into porn right when I entered senior high. Soon enough, I got addicted to it and felt very miserable and frustrated with life.

Girl frustrated with life

This was when I stumbled upon a book called the “Power of Habit”, written by Charles Duhigg. A few of my other blog posts are based on ideas from his book.

Let’s back to business! You want to end porn, that’s so cool. You have probably tried several methods only to find yourself doing it again.

I have tried this habit changing method from the Power of Habit, and it actually works. Although I’m not completely porn free, I have made giant strides in reducing my frequency of porn consumption. I’m well on my way to becoming 100% porn free.

This is why habits are so important in your life.

Procrastination held me down for years. Here’s how I learnt to procrastinate on procrastination.

How you can replace your porn habit

  • Acknowledge

    Unless you convince yourself that this habit is decreasing the quality of your life, habit change is challenging.

  • Research

    Every automated behavior is a product of the habit loop which consists of a cue, routine and a reward. Do your bit of self-analysis and learn what exactly puts you in that state of mind pre-porn consumption.

  • Experiment

    After researching, conduct experiments with various routines. The right routine is when your rewards are being met.

How it worked for me?

  1. I learned that I get the urge to watch porn when it’s late at night. I mean even after a long day of work, I couldn’t make myself sleep without participating in the ritual of filmed prostitution. So, my cue was simple: approaching the end of my day and a feeling of exhaustion.
  2. After several weeks of research and journal writing, about what I felt right before and after I carried out the routine of watching porn, I realized that the real reason I watch porn is not for the big O but simply so I can calm myself down and doze off to sleep with much lesser effort, and I also noticed that another reason I watch porn is coz I’m bored, and porn has a lot of action and doesn’t keep me bored. So my rewards are not feeling bored anymore and a peace of mind.
    So, the craving that drives this habit loop of pornography is not my desire to orgasm but to simply be able to combat boredom and sleep better.
  3. I checked online for some stress reduction techniques. I decided to go running in the evenings, this helps me to get rid of all the stress from my system, and when I hit the bed, I sleep like a baby.
  4. Since boredom is one of my rewards, I started reading. I got a kindle, and as soon as I feel the urge struck me, I open up a book and get engrossed into it so much that after a while, I don’t even feel like watching porn.

Note:
The key is to carry out your newly designed alternative right when the urge strikes. The sooner you get to the action, the higher are your chances to win.

And there are times when you might tell yourself, “I’ll just get a peek at porn, then I’ll stop.” But the harsh truth is that you can’t stop. When you start engaging in your old routine, your brain starts expecting the reward, and you might just automatically begin stroking yourself off.

I learned that by running or meditating, and by reading a book, I could put myself to sleep (thus getting the same reward of peace of mind and the elimination of boredom) without watching porn.

Rewards vary from person to person. Reading a book before going to bed might not help with your habit, that’s why the experimentation stage I mentioned earlier is crucial. You must accurately discover what are your rewards of the porn habit.

Now if I could do this, I’m a 100% sure that you can change your life too.

Old Joshua:

“When it’s late at night, I watch porn so I don’t feel bored anymore and I can sleep well.”

New Joshua:

“When it’s late at night, I read a book and meditate so I don’t feel bored and I’m at peace which allows me to sleep well.”

if you noticed, the cue and the rewards of both the loops remain the same; I have simply replaced the routine.

What if you fail?
Of course, there are the occasional times when I slip up and fail to meditate, but I keep learning from my mistakes.

Remember change is a process, and you gotta do all you can to change.
It takes change to make change.

Here’s how you can learn if the habits you developed are gambits or bandits.

Click here for an ultra-easy way to create habits.

  • Was this Post Helpful ?
  • yes   no

One Reply to “How I Put My Habit of Porn to Scorn4 minutes read

Comments are closed.